Jan 222013
Painful even now

Painful even now

While Jerry fiddles and (Jim) Rome burns, the Dallas Cowboys have quietly passed the torch to other teams. Like an Olympic runner carrying the torch (if the runner was falling down drunk and weaving in and out of traffic), Jerry has passed the Super Bowl supremacy torch to some of the Cowboys’ most hated rivals.

While the Steelers were the first team to reach four Super Bowl victories for a franchise, the Cowboys were the first to make it to the dance five times. Both teams accomplished these impressive feats in a ten-year span. Two of the Steelers’ wins came at the expense of the Cowboys. Well, one was on the Cowboys. The other, the Steelers only had to be Jackie Smith, the aging tight end that had a touchdown pas bounce off of him as he was on his butt, uncovered in the end zone.

(We are still mad, Jackie. Still seething.)

So, the first to five Super Bowls. Not bad.

The 49ers became the first team to win five Super Bowls. Along the way, they took down the Cowboys. There was Joe Montana, Dwight Clark and “The Catch,” the biggest batch of blind luck any future legend QB ever fell into with a 6’9″ Too Tall Jones draped over him.

But the Cowboys were not to be outdone. Jimmy Johnson had triplets. Their mommas named them Troy, Emmitt and Michael. And they were Hall of Fame-bound beasts, one and all. They added three more Super Bowl appearances/victories.

So, top that! Eight appearances. Five victories. Boo-yah!

Then, there was this fight over who was really the Triplets’ daddy, Jerry Jones or Jimmy Johnson. Jimmy claimed he built the team. Jerry said that any of five hundred coaches could have won with that talent. Mommy and daddy were fighting and mommy won.

Jerry ran off Jimmy, the triplets got old and tired, an era ended and a new one began.

Who could have dreamed what that era would be like? Just three playoff appearances. Just one measly victory. No sniffing of anything remotely like a Super Bowl.

Up in the Steel City, they were getting their act together, winning two more Super Bowls, under two different head coaches, and losing a third. So, they tie the Boys with eight appearances and take the lead with six victories.

Now, with one-half of the Harbaugh coaching duo at the helm, San Francisco is one win away from claiming their sixth Lombardi trophy.

Meanwhile, back on Valley Ranch, Jerry Jones spins like the Tasmanian Devil promising discomfort and change.

And I am thinking, Obama already has that covered, Jer. What we want is for you to move the heck out of the way so someone whose head is not up his own derriere  can get this thing moving towards that shiny trophy again.

Hurry. While we’re young. While we still have a shred of dignity.